Sunday, September 25, 2005

Arthritis, Metamucil, and Medicare

Well this Friday marked my 24th year on the blue planet, yup that’s right I’m getting old. My breakfast begins with a nice bran muffin and a glass of prune juice, and then a shot glass of vitamins. I am not sure as to what age makes you a morning person, but it’s not 24 I can tell you that much, I hate mornings now more than ever. I started drinking coffee on a regular basis about a month ago to prepare for my old age transformation. My yard still looks like crap so at least I’m not one of those old people that yell at kids for walking through their freshly trimmed grass. It seems that the volume on the television isn’t as loud as it used to be, but my health insurance doesn’t cover a miracle ear, so I’ll have to hook up surround sound. My memory has always been bad so I can’t tell if I am developing Alzheimer’s or not. I started putting money into an account so that my unborn children don’t have to pay for my funeral, because the average funeral costs these days is between 3-5 thousand dollars, and I don’t want to bare them with the burden. I developed some new habits like saving the twist ties from bread bags, reusing zip lock bags, and saving all of the rubber bands that come on the news paper. Which reminds me, I started reading the news paper, well the advertisements that come in the Sunday paper, but it’s a start. Well I gotta run, the prune juice is taking its toll on my decrepit body.

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